This report synthesizes peer-reviewed psychological research and clinical expert opinion regarding the long-term stability, psychological health, and sustainability of consensual Daddy Dom/little (DD/l) and similar caregiver/little power-exchange relationships. The analysis focuses specifically on whether such dynamics can be healthy and enduring when practiced by emotionally mature, competent adults as negotiated role-play, rather than reflecting developmental immaturity or pathology. The review prioritizes empirical studies and theoretical frameworks from licensed psychologists published in accredited journals such as the Journal of Sex Research, Archives of Sexual Behavior, and Psychology & Sexuality.
Based on comprehensive literature review, a significant gap exists in direct empirical research specifically addressing DD/l dynamics. No longitudinal studies were identified that examine the long-term psychological outcomes of consensual DD/l relationships in emotionally mature adults. This absence of targeted research represents a critical finding in itself. However, findings from related research on BDSM dynamics, attachment theory, consensual power exchange, and related phenomena provide valuable indirect insights.
Despite extensive searching across major psychology and sexuality journals, no peer-reviewed empirical studies were identified that specifically investigate the long-term psychological health, relational stability, or sustainability of consensual Daddy Dom/little or caregiver/little relationships as practiced between emotionally mature adults. The literature shows a marked absence of clinical assessments or longitudinal data focused exclusively on DD/l dynamics in the major peer-reviewed outlets requested [1].
While the colloquial term "daddy issues" appears in academic literature, it is exclusively discussed in contexts unrelated to consensual kink dynamics. One 2024 study in Violence Against Women examines "daddy issues" solely as a gendered weaponization tactic in abusive relationships, where perpetrators leverage past traumas to undermine victims' credibility—without any reference to consensual DD/l dynamics [2].
Two qualitative studies examine domestic discipline (DD) relationships, defined as relationships advocating wifely submission through disciplinary tactics like spanking. These studies analyze blog narratives from individuals in such relationships. The research documents how male "Doms" construct their identity through balancing discipline with love, while women describe performing submission and questioning gender roles [1, 7]. However, these studies don't focus on the distinct DD/l dynamic and don't assess long-term psychological outcomes.
A 2020 exploratory study on Adult Baby-Diaper Lovers (ABDL) investigated 38 adults from an Italian online community. The study found associations between ABDL behaviors and anxiety traits, recollections of childhood parental rejection, and general psychological maladjustment [4]. However, significant limitations include the small, non-representative sample size (drawn from a single online community) and methodological constraints that prevent generalization to consensual DD/l dynamics practiced by emotionally healthy adults [4, 21].
Notably, this research pathologizes ABDL behaviors without adequately distinguishing between clinical pathology and consensual adult role-play. The study concludes ABDL phenomena "assume different functions and meanings" but fails to explore healthy implementations, and it does not investigate any long-term relational outcomes [4].
The most relevant empirical findings come from research on broader BDSM dynamics, particularly a 2020 study titled "Partner-Selection, Power Dynamics, and Mutual Care-Giving in Long-Term Self-Defined BDSM Couples" [6]. This qualitative study conducted in-depth interviews with 33 individuals in 17 long-term self-defined BDSM couples (average relationship length: 5.5 years) and found that:
- Long-term BDSM relationships can be highly functional and enduring
- Compatibility in dominance/submission (D/s) roles was universal among couples (100% match)
- Power exchange serves purposes beyond sexual satisfaction, including facilitating partner bonding and providing security
- Key relationship values include "commitment to communication, transparency, trust, and mutual care"
- Couples used structured rituals during conflict resolution, often intensifying rather than dropping roles to reestablish connection
This research suggests that sustained consensual power imbalances need not be incompatible with psychological health or relational stability when grounded in mutual care and clear communication [6]. However, the study doesn't isolate DD/l specifically.
Research on Total Power Exchange (TPE) relationships, which include 24/7 master/slave dynamics, offers relevant insights despite not focusing specifically on caregiver/little structures. A 2022 phenomenological study titled "'A certain evolution': a phenomenological study of 24/7 BDSM and negotiating consent" analyzed interviews with four participants in such relationships [23]. The study identified key themes:
- Full-time integration of kink-related roles into identity
- Development of "dynamic consent" where consent is continuously negotiated within the relationship structure
- Practical integration of roles into daily routines and polyamorous contexts
- Viewing 24/7 BDSM as an "erotic lifestyle" supported by identity elements
The study emphasizes that these relationships represent "socially constructed, consensual, full-time adherence to kink-related roles" rather than pathological dependency [23].
The 2004 study "24/7 SM Slavery" examined full-time owner-slave dynamics in 146 individuals [9]. The research found that long-term relationships involving sustained power differentials extending beyond sexual contexts were reported as personally satisfying. Crucially, the study revealed that despite hierarchical structures, "slaves exercise free will when it aligns with their best interests," challenging assumptions about complete loss of autonomy [9].
Attachment theory provides the most relevant theoretical framework for understanding how caregiver/little dynamics might function psychologically. Research indicates that securely attached individuals typically characterize BDSM practices through trust, positive self-view, and relationship safety [16, 17]. These qualities create strong foundations for the emotional experiences involved in consensual power exchange [16].
Notably, studies examining attachment in BDSM participants found:
- Attachment styles among BDSM practitioners were not significantly different from non-BDSM populations [20]
- Anxiously attached individuals may seek relationships providing high certainty and predictability, like structured BDSM dynamics [16]
- Aftercare reinforces attachment bonds, particularly for anxiously attached individuals who may need additional reassurance [16]
- Rituals strengthen emotional bonds through consistent, predictable interactions [16]
These findings suggest that when consensual role-play aligns with secure attachment patterns, power dynamics may not necessarily undermine autonomy or self-efficacy [16, 17]. However, the attachment research typically doesn't focus on caregiver/little specifically.
Theoretical work on age regression and reparenting provides context for understanding non-pathological aspects of caregiver/little dynamics. Psychodynamic frameworks distinguish between voluntary, controlled regression (as seen in certain therapeutic techniques) and involuntary, dysfunctional regression [12, 13, 14].
Winnicott's "regression to dependence" concept is particularly relevant, describing how "a safe and nurturing environment" with an attuned caregiver figure can allow individuals to "reexperience the early mother-infant relationship" in a reparative way [13]. Essential elements include:
- A safe and nurturing environment
- An attuned caregiver who recognizes the individual's true feelings
- Opportunity for emotional processing
- Movement toward independence
- Development of self-integration [13]
Critically, this model emphasizes that therapeutic regression isn't about "making up for" past experiences but about "the caregiver's recognition of the individual's intrusive or depriving experience, and his capacity to contain the individual's pain... without being destroyed by it" [13]. When applied to consensual adult dynamics (with appropriate caveats about the clinical versus consensual contexts), this framework suggests that regulated, negotiated regression within role-play could potentially serve psychological functions without pathology.
Based on the available evidence, consensual power-exchange relationships—including those with ongoing hierarchical structures—can demonstrate long-term stability when grounded in specific relationship qualities. The Cutler et al. study found that long-term BDSM relationships (average 5.5 years) succeeded when built on "commitment to communication, transparency, trust, and mutual care" [6]. Similarly, the "24/7 SM Slavery" study documented long-term personally satisfying relationships with role integration into daily life [9].
However, no longitudinal data exists specifically tracking the stability of DD/l relationships over decades. The research suggests that the critical factor isn't the presence of power imbalance itself but whether the relationship incorporates mutual care, transparent communication, and the ability to maintain autonomy within the role structure [6, 8, 9].
Current research indicates that sustained role-based power imbalances need not erode autonomy when certain conditions are met. The "24/7 SM Slavery" study explicitly found that "slaves exercise free will when it aligns with their best interests," suggesting a nuanced reality beyond simple domination [9]. Similarly, research on TPE relationships shows that deep emotional exposure and mutual trust—rather than absolute control—form the basis of consent [8].
Attachment theory provides additional insight: when power exchange occurs within secure attachment patterns, it may enhance rather than undermine psychological wellbeing [16, 17]. The BDSM literature emphasizes that negotiated roles often create safety and predictability that benefit individuals with anxious attachment styles [16].
However, without specific research on DD/l, it's impossible to state with certainty how these dynamics affect autonomy over time. The theoretical risk lies in potential role-enmeshment where the boundaries between role and identity become blurred—a risk that appears mitigated through practices like aftercare, role negotiation, and maintaining outside social connections, as documented in broader BDSM research [6, 16].
Positive relational outcomes associated with consensual power exchange include:
- Enhanced relationship satisfaction through structured role clarity
- Deepened connection through mutual trust and vulnerability
- Emotional security provided by predictable relational patterns
- Opportunity for healing attachment wounds in a controlled environment [6, 16]
The Cutler et al. study specifically documented that power exchange "facilitates partner bonding and provides a sense of security" [6]. Similarly, attachment research suggests BDSM dynamics can create "a strong foundation for the intense emotional experiences" when grounded in secure attachment [16].
Potential risks include:
- Emotional dependency if boundaries between role and real identity become confused
- Erosion of self-efficacy if the power differential creates genuine skill atrophy
- Relationship fragility if the dynamic depends on constant performance of narrow roles
- Social isolation due to stigma [6, 16]
Research indicates these risks are minimized when relationships prioritize "communication, transparency, trust, and mutual care" [6]. The ABDL study noting potential links to anxiety and parental rejection [4] doesn't establish causation and may pathologize benign behavior without sufficient evidence.
Importantly, no peer-reviewed studies explicitly examine whether DD/l relationships demonstrate higher rates of negative outcomes like emotional dependency compared to non-kink relationships. The available evidence neither confirms nor denies the user's hypothesis that such relationships "ultimately turn sour or boring or self-destructive in the long term."
The academic literature reveals a significant research gap regarding the specific psychological outcomes of consensual Daddy Dom/little dynamics between emotionally mature adults. No empirical studies directly address the long-term stability, mental health impact, or relational outcomes of DD/l as practiced in contemporary communities.
However, broader research on consensual power exchange offers relevant insights. Studies suggest that when sustained power imbalances incorporate "commitment to communication, transparency, trust, and mutual care," they can be stable, satisfying, and psychologically functional over time [6]. The 24/7 BDSM literature further indicates that integrating hierarchical roles into daily life need not erode autonomy, as "slaves exercise free will when it aligns with their best interests" [9].
Theoretical frameworks from attachment theory and psychodynamic approaches help contextualize how caregiver/little dynamics might function non-pathologically when grounded in security and mutual recognition [13, 16, 17]. Critically, research distinguishes consensual role-play from abuse through the presence of "mutual informed consent [which] is the hallmark feature distinguishing BDSM from abuse and psychopathology" [15].
Based on the available evidence, there is no scientific basis to claim that DD/l relationships—when practiced by emotionally mature adults with clear negotiation, boundaries, and communication—are inherently unstable or psychologically harmful. Conversely, the absence of direct research means we cannot confidently assert their universal long-term sustainability. What appears critical is not the specific role format but whether the relationship incorporates elements documented across relationship science: security, transparency, mutual care, and the ability to renegotiate boundaries as needed [6, 16].
The field would benefit significantly from targeted research specifically examining DD/l dynamics in diverse populations over extended periods, with methodology designed to distinguish between healthy role-play and pathological dependency.
[1] "A view from the top": crafting the male "Domdentity" in domestic discipline relationships: https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA406051388&sid=googleScholar&v=2.1&it=r&linkaccess=abs&issn=10608265&p=AONE&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7Ea996878e&aty=open-web-entry
[2] "Daddy Issues" and Diagnoses: Gendered Weaponization of Mental Health in Intimate Relationships: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/39223964/
[3] Daddy: A psychoanalytic study of BDSM - Ray Antwi: https://medium.com/@raydorian12/declaration-16ae9aba1542
[4] An Exploratory Study of Adult Baby-Diaper Lovers' Characteristics in an Italian Online Sample: https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/17/4/1371/pdf
[5] Parenting style patterns and their longitudinal impact on mental health in abused and nonabused adolescents: https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychiatry/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2025.1548549/full?utm_source=chatgpt.com
[6] Partner-Selection, Power Dynamics, and Mutual Care-Giving in Long-Term Self-Defined BDSM Couples: https://journalofpositivesexuality.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/10.51681.1.624_Partner-selection-power-dynamics-and-mutual-care-giving-in-long-term-self-defined-BDSM-couples-Cutler-Lee-Cutler-Sagarin.pdf
[7] "Topping from the bottom": relational convergence of meaning in domestic discipline relationships: https://go.gale.com/ps/i.do?id=GALE%7CA407815137&sid=googleScholar&v=2.1&it=r&linkaccess=abs&issn=10955143&p=AONE&sw=w&userGroupName=anon%7E56da12c&aty=open-web-entry
[8] BDSM and total power exchange: Between inclusion and exclusion: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/13634607231170320
[9] 24/7 SM Slavery: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1300/J082v50n02_05
[10] "Topping from the Bottom": Relational Convergence of Meaning in Domestic Discipline Relationships: https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s12119-014-9247-0?wt_mc=alerts.TOCjournals&error=cookies_not_supported&code=00e674b5-5a01-424a-8918-8ea50ab95183
[11] Limerence Through the Lens of Regression as a Defense Mechanism: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/limerence-through-lens-regression-defense-mechanism-patnayakuni-b51sc
[12] Regressive Work as a Therapeutic Treatment: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1177/036215379002000406
[13] Regression to Dependence: A Second Opportunity for Ego: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/3895952-regression-to-dependence
[14] Voluntary Age Regression Entering "Headspace" in a Child With Post-traumatic Stress Disorder: https://ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8918204/
[15] The Role of Consent in the Context of BDSM: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1079063219842847
[16] BDSM and Attachment Theory: Exploring Emotional Bonds in Kink: https://www.theaftercarelounge.com/post/bdsm-and-attachment-theory
[17] Attachment Theory and the Kink Lifestyle: https://bravenmanor.com/resources/Attachment%20Theory%20and%20the%20Kink%20Lifestyle.pdf
[18] Attachment Styles in BDSM: Navigating Relationships: https://blog.lilithfoxx.com/attachment-styles-in-bdsm/
[19] Attachment Insecurity and the Regulation of Power and Dependence in Intimate Relationships: https://www.cambridge.org/core/books/abs/power-in-close-relationships/attachment-insecurity-and-the-regulation-of-power-and-dependence-in-intimate-relationships/013319DD3E2C375364035C2D5741D33B
[20] The Psychology of Kink: A Cross-Sectional Survey Investigating the Association Between Adult Attachment Style and BDSM-Related Identity Choice in China: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38453777/
[21] What do we know about Adult Baby Diaper Lover (ABDL) mental health? A scoping review: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/386172944_What_do_we_know_about_Adult_Baby_Diaper_Lover_ABDL_mental_health_A_scoping_review
[22] Paraphilic infantilism, diaperism and pedophilia: A review: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1752928X18300726
[23] 'A certain evolution': a phenomenological study of 24/7 BDSM and negotiating consent: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/19419899.2021.1901771